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To Meddle: To interfere in or busy oneself unduly with something that is not one’s concern. (Google Definition)

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It is as bad that we meddle in our own business as it is that we meddle in the affairs of others. Meddling is an internal compulsion to fiddle with our perception of events. The result is a skewed understanding of reality. That makes it more likely that we will make poor choices and take actions that increase unhappiness rather than bring greater happiness into our lives, which makes the spiritual healing tools we use ever so more important.

Anytime we re-live an event we are meddling. Whether the event was positive or negative, ‘re-membering’ is exactly what the word comprises: It is the business of putting the body back together. Reassembling the torso, arms, and legs of an event that is pocketed in pieces throughout the brain.

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That is exactly what brain research shows. We do not store memories as a whole. Events get broken down into components (verbal, visual, auditory, olfactory, etc.) that are stored separately. It is like putting the gravy in one container, the chicken and the mashed potatoes in two others. To serve the leftovers as a meal we must pull them all together again. To recall an event, we have to reconstruct it with a lot of scattered pieces stored here and there throughout the brain.

Creating a Memory

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To first create a memory, we have to pay attention as an event unfolds in the moment. Anything we dismiss as unimportant may not be stored. That means we don’t remember what we don’t notice. Worse, we are likely to miss anything we don’t expect to see. If you aren’t so sure of this, you can have fun testing yourself on the invisible gorilla website.

Finally, it turns out we remember new events and information better if we can tie them to something we already know or to similar events that happened in the past. When we can’t do that (something is new or unexpected) then we are less likely to retain the information and if we do we are more likely to distort the information.

Memories & Spiritual Healing

Healing tools for spirituality

What does this have to do with healing? Simply, we each have a story we tell ourselves about ourselves and about our life. It can be as simple as, “My parents were constantly yelling at me. Everything I did was wrong. I felt stupid, ugly, and unlovable.” The story becomes a mental magnet. Facing the prospect of returning to school, or dating after a divorce, a person with such a story may feel overwhelmed. “I can’t possibly learn all this. I’m not smart enough,” or, “No one will ever really love me.”

Any experience that runs counter to the story has nothing to hang onto in existing memory. With no ready place to attach itself, a successful learning experience is more likely to be forgotten. If it is recalled, it will be one of those ‘exceptions that prove the rule.’

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A friend of mine concluded “nobody really loves me” from her life experience. She said, “I’m low maintenance. Just a single flower would be enough.” When her husband ordered flowers flown from South America she went ballistic. “It’s too much money! We don’t have enough vases!” That he wanted to overwhelm her with his love never got on the radar. Although her friends presented another perspective (“He loves you!”) she struggled to grasp that view since it didn’t match her personal story.

Healing By Self-Exploration

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For healing to occur we must first be clear about the underlying emotional story we believe. That demands sincere exploration of our deeper beliefs. In my case, an energy healer I knew remarked to me, “You were rejected.” It was a long time later before I acknowledged to myself that I felt rejected and that rejection is the underlying narrative I put together about my life. It took so long because intellectually I knew it wasn’t true. But the life story isn’t about what we know with our minds, it is all about what we hold in our body and emotions.

That first step allowed me to take the next step to healing. I examined and questioned my belief. I considered deeply how I had come to such a belief. I paid attention and meditated on how I held that belief in my body. Over time, memories of all that my parents gave and sacrificed to give began to surface. I had received so much from them. I was never passed by. These memories became hooks for new experiences of being accepted and appreciated. Together, the old and new memories created a new story about my life.

As the years have gone on, the memories of my parents’ love have continued to open up. The older narrative can still rear its’ head. (Just let someone say, “That newsletter was terrible!”) But now I have a greater perspective and a greater context in which to hold such an experience. I still have my edge where it is difficult not to feel overwhelmed by rejection and that is the place where I continue my exploration, meditation, and daily practice. And will do so for all of my life.


If you’re looking for spiritual healer in Scottsdale Arizona, reach out and contact Dr. Sandra Egli at Center of Intention to start your holistic journey. Call 480-582-3374 today!

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Meditate Right Now

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Meditation: Sandra Egli
Music: Torey Ronhovde

The wisdom of a thousand generations guides you today. Only listen. Without a sound their voices reverberate in your cells. Settle within and choose your path.

All of us come from strength, fortitude, perseverance. No matter how difficult their lives, our ancestors made it through and passed on life for the next generation. Over and over, until it came to you. The intelligence that guided them has also come to you.

To Thine own Self be true.

If I could present you with a single blessing, it would be the gift of Mindfulness. Awareness of yourself: body, emotions, and self-talk, all the time. Our immediate experience is the ultimate exploration that only grows richer with time. What we do or don't do, and the roots of our behavior, are accessible with the simple practice of noticing immediate experience. It is this practice that makes it possible to know and be true to ourselves.


Sandra's graceful way of listening & non-judgmental demeanor allowed me to open up effortlessly. I was certain, as I left her office, that I had received precisely the healing I needed.

Female client, age 44
Phoenix, Arizona