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Setting Spiritual Boundaries

We have a tendency to believe that if we love enough if we are enlightened, then setting spiritual boundaries are not necessary. It isn’t true. In this material universe, everything is defined by separation. Our bodies, our thoughts, carpets and chairs all have some dividing line to define inside and out. These demarcations let us be ourselves and the chair be a chair.

This structure of separation is the foundation of our world. The partner of separation is love. We could also say that love is the foundation of the world and structure is the partner. Most everyone reading this newsletter believes in the essential role of love in the universe. When it comes to structure and boundaries we must think a little harder.

spiritual boundaries examples

Boundaries are Essential

In fact, boundaries are a gift and none of us could live without them. Both personal and societal freedom depend on boundaries. On the personal level missing or weak boundaries result in a loss of self to the expectations, demands, and invasions of the people around us – too much caretaking of everyone else and not enough of ourselves. Most of us are familiar with that dilemma. There is a fine line between healthy generosity and a lack of self-care.

On a societal level, no boundaries mean no expectation or enforcement of any behavior. It would be ok to run a red light, avoid paying taxes, or harm another person. Such a world would be unsafe and chaotic. No one in it would be free.

enforcing spiritual boundaries

Structure Supports Freedom

Real freedom blossoms when we acknowledge and work with the structure in which we live. This begins with our bodies. For example, bodies need nutrition. If we disrespect the need it is at our peril leading to poor health. All of the structures in which we live require attention to their upkeep. This is as true of our government as it is of the homes in which we live.

Structure itself is not hostile; it supports freedom. We have always been dependent on others for the lives we lead. We do not each grow our own food and make our clothes. Even if you understand the processes involved, it still requires a massive infrastructure and many people to maintain our way of life. This is not just the case in our age, it has always been so.

power of personal boundaries

In fact, no group of living creatures exists without some form of structure between them. Within the animal kingdom there are rules of territory and hierarchy. Territory is defined by sufficiency-to-support one or more members. Hierarchy assures survival of the species and procreation is the right of the dominant. The earth itself follows set laws (e.g., objects and rain fall and tides ebb and flow).

We cannot be free without respecting structure nor can we be free without love. Hatred and fear (the real opposite of love) confine us more than any man-made prison. Fear is never a foundation for freedom.

Structures in the World

rationalizing anger in your life

There are two kinds of structures in the world. There are loving structures created by the universe or by people and there are structures that result from the misperceptions of hatred and fear. To discern loving laws and laws that result from misperceptions is not easy. We must consider these matters deeply and we will still have differing points of view.

True freedom calls for us to move beyond a selfish perspective that wants things to be the way we want (like spoiled children). Many of our opinions are nothing more than our insistence that society conforms to our idea of how things should be. Spiritual maturity is accepting that the world is not perfect. We are not perfect nor is anyone else.

We rationalize our anger with the current situation by focusing on how the other person is wrong. Instead, we should be checking the motives that underlay our own opinions.

personal consciousness

An open mind  and heart are necessary for freedom. When you are in resistance to what other people think, focus on your feelings. Are you in love or fear? In love you can look with an utterly open mind and choose what is the specific right perspective for you. The specific right perspective for another person can be quite different. It is only in knowing ourselves and our motives that we can make a choice in right personal consciousness. Then, we will disagree yet remain at peace and in love with one another.


If you’re looking for a spirtual healer in Phoenix, reach out and contact Dr. Sandra Egli at Center of Intention to start your holistic journey. Call (480) 860-0400 today!


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Meditation: Sandra Egli
Music: Torey Ronhovde

The wisdom of a thousand generations guides you today. Only listen. Without a sound their voices reverberate in your cells. Settle within and choose your path.

All of us come from strength, fortitude, perseverance. No matter how difficult their lives, our ancestors made it through and passed on life for the next generation. Over and over, until it came to you. The intelligence that guided them has also come to you.

To Thine own Self be true.

If I could present you with a single blessing, it would be the gift of Mindfulness. Awareness of yourself: body, emotions, and self-talk, all the time. Our immediate experience is the ultimate exploration that only grows richer with time. What we do or don't do, and the roots of our behavior, are accessible with the simple practice of noticing immediate experience. It is this practice that makes it possible to know and be true to ourselves.


Sandra's graceful way of listening & non-judgmental demeanor allowed me to open up effortlessly. I was certain, as I left her office, that I had received precisely the healing I needed.

Female client, age 44
Phoenix, Arizona